I move too fast.
I’m always moving. Even my brain never stops. I walk fast. I always have somewhere to be that is more important than where I am at the moment.
It’s not just the city I live in, it’s the world I live in. The internet age, the fast food era, instant gratification, stat.
I always need to move. I always need to go. It’s a constant condition. Stasis scares me. Calm scares me. Silence scares me.
I’ve never learned to just take a moment and appreciate the place I am right in the moment.
And I always miss so much like that. The way the flowers gracefully burst off a tree, the butterfly drifting past, the miracle of throngs of people existing and surviving in such close, intense proximity all the time. It’s so strange how we live so close to each other but we keep one another so far away.
It’s worth it – and more than that, it’s okay – to slow down once in a while. Enjoy the scenery.
I’ll never know what I’ve missed but I can try to take it slower and try to enjoy more, now.
Yesterday, I went to my beloved yoga in the park, and Janna was wonderful enough to meet me (we were bad bloggers, we took no pictures – but trust us, you don’t need to see how sweaty we were). The instructor prompted us to imagine, in that time, that we were simply on vacation. Nowhere to be but in the moment.
It’s not easy, not for me. But I want to carry that with me.
Next time I get stressed out, overwhelmed, and I think the load is too heavy I can turn into my mind, my quiet space, and find that inner sense of peace I know is there waiting for me to remember it. I can turn off my cell phone, go for a walk without my iPod, feel the grass beneath my bare feet.
I want to slow down. So I will try.